The films of Woody Allen ranked
2023 will see the release of the 50th film to be directed by Woody Allen. Made in Paris in Wintertime, this new drama features a cast made up of Ceasar nominated French actors; Niels Schneider, Lou de Laage, Melvil Poupaud, Valerie Lemercier and Elsa Zylberstein. Le Document decided to cast a critical eye on the previous 49 films Woody Allen has made ...
Take The Money And Run (1969) A crime documentary or mockumentary that’s worth a watch. Typical gag: “After 15 minutes I wanted to marry her, and after half an hour I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.”
7/10Bananas (1971) Good in part. The scene where Woody’s character (Fielding Mellish) is dumped by Nancy (played by Allen’s ex wife in real life, Louise Lasser, is very funny. There is also a great court room scene where Mellish describes the trial as being “a travesty. It’s a travesty of a mockery of a travesty of two mockeries of a sham.”
6/10Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex (1972) Good in part. Worth watching for the infamous sketch where Gene Wilder plays a doctor who falls in love with a sheep.
6/10Sleeper (1973) Good in part. Some amusing scenes such as Allen hogging “the Orgasmatron.”
6/10Love And Death (1975) A very funny film. When the beautiful Countess Alexandrovna tells Boris Grushenko he’s the greatest lover she ever had, Boris reveals he practises a lot when he’s alone.”
9/10Annie Hall (1977) A comedy classic. “There’s an old joke – um ... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of them says, Boy, the food at this place is really terrible. The other one says, Yeah, I know; and such small portions. Well, that’s essentially how I feel about life – full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it’s all over much too quickly.”
10/10Interiors (1978) A good film but not a great one 6 out of 10.
Manhattan (1979) “New York was his town, and it always would be.” A fantastic film that’s of its time but beautifully shot and a pleasure to watch. Woody’s love letter to NYC.
9/10Stardust Memories (1980) Another fantastic film. The scene where we see Charlotte Rampling flirting and hear Louis Armstrong sing are perfection. There are also wonderfully funny moments.
9/10A Midsummer Night’s Sex Comedy (1982) Pleasant enough but nothing to write home about.
6/10Zelig (1983) A very interesting and original thought provoking film. 9 out of 10
Broadway Danny Rose (1984) A wonderful movie. Funny and moving and beautifully shot.
10/10The Purple Rose Of Cairo (1985) A lovely film about the harshness of reality. 8 out of 10.
Hannah And Her Sisters (1986) Another classic film with great performances by all involved. 10 out of 10.
Radio Days (1987) a wonderfully charming and funny film about Woody’s childhood.
9/10September (1987) A weak film that’s incredibly forgettable.
4/10Another Woman (1988) Great film, great cast.
7/10New York Stories (1989) Very funny short film about mothers.
7/10.Crimes And Misdemeanours (1989) A fantastic film.
9/10Alice (1990) Nothing to write home about.
5/10Shadows And Fog (1991) Beautifully shot but boring. A great cast but a weak film.
5/10Husbands And Wives (1992) Fantastic.
9/10Manhattan Murder Mystery (1993) Neither good nor bad typical gag: “You don’t have to see your shrink, there’s nothing wrong with you that can’t be cured with a little Prozac and a polo mallet.”
6/10Bullets Over Broadway (1994) A lovely film. When a young playwright meets someone willing to finance his play he asks what kind of firm the man works for. The reply is: “It’s a don’t stick your nose in other people’s business and it wont get broke type business.”
8/10Mighty Aphrodite (1995) described by the Guardian as being a pathetic film by a pathetic man. However, Mira Sorvino is great as porn star Judy Cum. Typical gag: “You didn’t want a blow job so I thought the least I could do was buy you a tie.”
5/10Everyone Says I Love You (1996) A curious musical – Woody sings “I’m Thru With Love”. Interesting but not quite on the money and no big laughs however there is one wonderful scene where Goldie Hawn floats in the sky.
5/10Deconstructing Harry (1997) There are moments of greatness in this funny, but dodgy, spiky comedy. Typical line: “If the choice is between air condition and the Pope, I chose air conditioning.”
8/10Celebrity (1998) Judy Davis is wonderful at displaying anger and her “Am I lying? Am I lying” rant is a joy to watch as is a scene that takes place at a high school reunion but overall this film is disappointing.
6/10Sweet And Lowdown (1999) Woody gets wonderful performance out of Sean Penn and Samantha Morton there’s something wonderful music and one very moving scene.
7/10Small Time Crooks (2000) Tracey Ullman and Hugh Grant are both good in this film. Some of the best scenes are conversations had between Woody and Elaine May. Woody describes Elaine’s character as being both a stroke victim and as being as dumb as a horse.
7/10The Curse of Jade Scorpion (2001) Woody tried to get all sorts of stars take the male lead in this film. When they turned him down he decided to play the role himself – a mistake as he was far too old. The film is pleasant enough but nothing special. Typical line: “I may be a scummy vermin but I’m an honest scummy vermin.”
5/10Hollywood Ending (2002) A very disappointing film with no great scenes and hardly any decent gags. “For me, the nicest thing about masturbation is afterward, the cuddling time.”
4/10Anything Else (2003) Woody wrote this as a novel and then decided to try and turn it into a film script. There is one very funny scene where Danny Devito plays a manager whose betrayed by the artist he sees as a son but most of this film is weak. Typical line: “You know, if a guy comes out onstage at Carnegie Hall and throws up, you can always find some people who call it art.”
5/10Melinda And Melinda (2004) Embarrassing rubbish. Incredibly disappointing. Best line: “What do I do for exercise? Tiddly Winks and an occasional panic attack.”
2/10Match Point (2005) Thrilling and sexy. The best scenes feature Scarlet Johanson.
6/10Scoop (2006) Very charming in parts but not all funny. Could have been aimed at children.
5/10Cassandra’s Dream (2007) An awful film. So weak. Best avoided.
2/10Vicky Cristina Barcelona (2008) Pleasant but a bit silly.
5/10Whatever Works (2009) Some funny moments but overall disappointing.
4/10You’ll Meet A Tall Dark Handsome Stranger (2010) Anthony Hopkins is wonderful in this surprising and original film.
7/10Midnight In Paris (2011) Although not especially funny, this film is very charming.
7/10To Rome With Love (2012) Woefully unfunny. Definitely not worth watching.
3/10Blue Jasmine (2013) Woody gets a fantastic performance from Cate Blanchett in this great drama that is quite touching at times.
7/10Magic In The Moonlight (2014) Incredibly ok, vaguely good.
6/10Irrational Man (2015) Another reasonable effort.
6/10Cafe Society (2016) Good in places but nothing special.
5/10Wonder Wheel (2017) Kate Winslet is good in this film which probably would have worked better as a play.
6/10A Rainy Day In New York (2019) Timothy Chalet does his best in another so so effort from Woody.
6/10.Rifkin’s Festival (2020) The dream sequences that feature in this film include Wallace Shawn and Christoph Waltz doing an amusing take on Bergman’s masterpiece The Seventh Seal but overall this movie is weak.
4/10
List, comments and ratings compiled by Harry Pye
